Positive Linking eZine: August 25, 2017

kay white enewsletter

Volume 157 |  25 August 2017 

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Hello There

Hello there %$firstname$%,

It’s been a reflective kind of time here at Sparkle Central. Quieter and slower in pace and, at the same time, the sense of the rollercoaster ride approaching. Hosting and planning a 3-day live event (with a team of course) does mean my To Do or To Decide clipboards are full. I’m so excited to update you that we’re over 60% full with 6 weeks to go and I sense that this year will be the biggest, most energetically powerful Event yet.

Here’s the thing %$firstname$%. I firmly believe you never step in a river in the same place twice. You can’t. It flows, time flows, you change, the landscape changes and even though I’ve created this event 4 times already (5 if you count my dramatic false-start last year collapsing on stage after 45 minutes with Labrynthitis) and so each time it’s different. Many women have come to every one. Each year up levelling themselves along with me too.

Talking of up-levelling and going with the flow, Snowy and I went to a local Children’s Hospice family fun day and learned so much from chatting with some of the parents who come to the hospice daily. Hearing them speaking about the severe challenges their children face and how their children have become their teachers in resilience, humility and kindness was very emotional.

We all have teachers touching our lives daily. If we look and pay attention, I met up with another teacher of mine last week. Penny. Penny was the Manager of the Carehome my father spent his last months in. Penny helped me to understand how to be with my Dad (who had fairly advanced Dementia at the end of his life) and she taught me how to be the daughter “your Dad needs now”. I learned not to correct some of Dad’s wandering comments “Ah, you’re here, good. Kay was here the other day and you know what she’s like” as he said to me a few times… I learned to go with the flow of his thinking, not mine and it made for a happier and more peaceful time together.

Meeting Penny again made me realise how much I’ve learned and how far I’ve come myself in the 10 years since Dad died. How my Dad was a teacher in my life, especially at the end of his life. Penny continues to share her kind, objective wisdom and, those families whose lives she touches are lucky too. That’s a teacher isn’t it? And you’re one too. So am I.

So %$firstname$%, whilst this may be a little less “Yay, it’s all great” in its energy, my brief update here is also heartfelt. To be able to share with others some of the lessons and experiences which shape us is to realise how much we’ve learned ourselves and that, as ever, is a lesson in our humility too.

Remember %$firstname$%, always be true to yourself – no one else can be the unique, one-off, multi-faceted person you are! No one.

Thank you for taking the time to read this eZine as I’m sure you have so much vying for your attention. I hope the ideas and suggestions help you reflect and to show up, sparkle and be heard even more at work.

Warm and ever-sparkly wishes %$firstname$%,


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PS – Oscar Wilde Said it best, %$firstname$% when he said “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Enough said.

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What's Happening

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard ™

3-Day LIVE Event 2017

Registration is OPEN NOW for my FINAL 3-Day Live Event

If you know you need to step up and accelerate your success at work AND allow yourself to be seen, valued and heard – do be there in October. Here’s the date and it will be in London again. Join me LIVE and learn with and from other ambitious, experienced women like you.

AND it will be the FINAL Event in this formation I host for the foreseeable, maybe forever…

If you’ve been thinking about coming ‘one of these days’ well, this year in OCTOBER will be your last chance….

>> 5, 6, 7 October 2017.

Here’s where you can Register << this is the FINAL one in this formation for some time, maybe forever….

AND we already have nearly 60% of our seats with a SOLD sign on them and that’s with 8 weeks to go.

Use the code >>> 100SPECIALCODE and take £100 off the Seat Price whilst we have them.

AND as a BONUS also receive the recording of a call I hosted recently about identifying and leveraging your transferrable skills. Understanding these enables you to switch roles/organisations/industries with more confidence and ease.

Yours as you register.

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Learning From Our Teachers

There’s always a lesson (and a teacher) if you look

It’s easy isn’t it, to associate being taught and having teachers to being at school? Who wants to think of themselves at school all their life and yet, in reality, we are. I know I am.

Someone once said to me “Kay, every day’s a school day” and on some level it’s true. Now whilst you might not have enjoyed your school days and so this idea would be horrifying, it’s more about the act of learning, of continuing to learn. Of being the student.

Even the most grim, tough situation teaches us so much. Even the most selfish, bitchy or plain bullying kind of person also teaches us so much. Not always easy to see but so worthwhile to do.

Think about these few quick questions for a second.

– What situation do you know you really struggled with?
– What strengths did you have to develop to handle it?
– How has it changed you?
– Who else played a key part in this situation?
– What did they teach you?

Even when I reflect on my Mum dying suddenly when I was 40, I learned so much from what happened, how I responded, who came forward to help me, who couldn’t bear to speak with me as it was too embarrassing or uncomfortable for them – to name just a few lessons.

Being so ill when I was 16 and being forever changed by the operations and chemo. Who supported my parents, how my parents behaved, how I had to ‘grow up’ by being on an adults’ ward and the myriad of lessons which unconsciously were taught to me. They’re lessons I take with me, everywhere. Still.

That’s my point. You get to choose if a situation teaches you something. You get to choose if a person and their behaviour teaches you something too. That gives you the power to always take something, however small it might feel, from a situation. Take it, and then, when you’re ready, pass it on.

As for the great situations, where things are all in flow and go your way – well there are just as many lessons in there too. Just as many teachers for you too.

I always say “You teach as you share” and if you share the lessons you’ve learned – sometimes the hardest way – you become someone else’s teacher, often remembered forever.

I’d love to hear what you think. You can leave me a comment or a note here.

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Do you want to use this article in your eZine or on your website?

Please do but only if you include this complete “blurb” with it:
“Article reproduced with permission of Kay White, Savvy & Influential Communication Expert and Mentor at www.kaywhite.com.

Kay shows experienced – and often frustrated – business women (and very smart men) how to be heard and understood by accessorising their day-to-day interactions with subtle, influential phrases and words to make people sit up, listen and take action. Kay’s book, The A to Z of Being Understood is an international #1 Bestseller: http://amzn.to/kTJYdX and helps professionals make their voices heard and their conversations really count.”

To see any previous issues of this eZine or comment on an article, please go to www.kaywhite.com (you’ll find the link to previous eZines on the Blog page, on the right). I’m always interested to hear from you.

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“I know I’m richer as a result of being here.”

“I was intrigued by the title of the Event! The idea of having access to all the like-minded professional women Kay attracts really motivated me to come. I didn’t want it to end!

I’ve learned so much about myself both from Kay and what she shares and from the generous sharing of other women in the audience. I would never have got access to the sorts of things I’ve learned if I hadn’t had the sense to come here.

I know I’m richer as a result of being here. I’ve opened up to how I can do things differently to realise my potential, be a better person, earn more money and really be much happier in myself.

Kay’s so thoughtful and understands what you need before you do and she’s very warm, real and really, really great fun! Be open – what have you got to lose? For a small investment you can get huge access to ways to be truly extraordinary – learn from Kay.”


Kay's Owl

S is for Samar AND Smart, Strong, Strategic

For 3 more of these sort of positive, punchy and powerful words go to: www.kaywhite.com and find today’s words at the bottom of the page. They’re there to motivate, inspire, compel both you and those around you as you use them every day.

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Option B by Sheryl Sandberg & Adam Grant

From Facebook’s COO and Wharton’s top-rated professor, the #1 New York Times best-selling authors of Lean In and Originals: a powerful, inspiring, and practical book about building resilience and moving forward after life’s inevitable setbacks.

After the sudden death of her husband, Sheryl Sandberg felt certain that she and her children would never feel pure joy again. “I was in ‘the void,’” she writes, “a vast emptiness that fills your heart and lungs and restricts your ability to think or even breathe.” Her friend Adam Grant, a psychologist at Wharton, told her there are concrete steps people can take to recover and rebound from life-shattering experiences. We are not born with a fixed amount of resilience. It is a muscle that everyone can build.

Beginning with the gut-wrenching moment when she finds her husband, Dave Goldberg, collapsed on a gym floor, Sheryl opens up her heart—and her journal—to describe the acute grief and isolation she felt in the wake of his death. But Option B goes beyond Sheryl’s loss to explore how a broad range of people have overcome hardships including illness, job loss, sexual assault, natural disasters, and the violence of war. Their stories reveal the capacity of the human spirit to persevere . . . and to rediscover joy.

Sheryl is most definitely teaching us (and healing herself) as she shares

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Savvy Style & Sparkle Soundbite

Always handy and always in your handbag!

A sparkly, fun keyring which holds some handy cash.

I’ve lost count of how many times this little baby has helped me out. Keeping a £20 note in it, the times when I don’t have my purse, when I want to stop to pick up some bits and bobs and ‘shazam’ my magic money comes to the rescue.

Mine’s by Anya Hindmarch and you can find similar ones on eBay (saving you more money for your purse!)

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About Kay

Known as the Savvy & Influential Communication Expert for Ambitious Women in Business, Kay mentors and coaches professional women who want to attract promotion, recognition and rewards at work without feeling they have to ‘sell their soul’.

Running her own multiple 6-figure coaching & mentoring business for over 10 years, Kay shows her clients, who are corporate career women at all different stages of their careers, how to naturally attract more income and opportunity while being true to themselves.

Kay’s clients learn how to present themselves most effectively at work and to combine strategic, planned career move-making steps with influencing skills. She also teaches compelling and assertive language and powerful mindsets around, for example, money, ambition and worthiness. She draws on her own 20+ years corporate career in the male-dominated world of London insurance broking. Kay started her career at 18 as a Secretary and left as a Director, having also worked for the company in Paris, to start her own coaching business. Some of her ex-colleagues have become clients and Kay still speaks French – now more enthusiastically than fluently.

Hosting an annual 3-day Live Event for corporate career women “Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE” Kay encourages and shows women how to be the best, most valuable version of themselves so they’re ready to be paid what their worth and go for what they want with certainty. Crucially too, how to have more ease and more fun as you plan your way forward.

Kay is author of the Number 1 Best-Seller “The A to Z of Being Understood” and you can connect and find out more from Kay at: www.kaywhite.com

Living close to London with rescue sighthounds, Jeffrey, Pharaoh & DeeDee, much of Kay’s inspiration comes from walking ‘the hounds’ as she calls them – whatever the UK weather – early in the mornings in the local countryside. Kay’s husband says she’s the Pack Leader and he knows he’s part of the pack.

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