Positive Linking eZine: January 8, 2016

kay white enewsletter

Volume 125 | 8 January 2016  

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Hello There

Hello there %$firstname$%,

Well here we are again and the beginning of a New Year. “Another year over, and a new one just begun” as John Lennon so poignantly sang. “Let’s hope it’s a good one” is, of course, a great intention and it all depends what ‘good’ means to you.

We had a really relaxing Christmas and New Year break and I committed to being unplugged and, with the exception of only a couple of emails and a Skype call, I was. Being so attached to my Mac and related gizmos running my global business and regularly hosting virtual events means it’s a real wrench to get me offline. Once I unplugged though %$firstname$%, that was me done. Even social media moments were rare and no email checking.

It makes you realise how much you can engage with friends, family and true social scenes when you leave the gizmos switched off! Neil, an ex-colleague and now great friend, my sister and I went for a 4 mile walk whilst Snowy held down the sofa at home.

Snowy was less than relaxed though when he dived into the North Sea on Boxing Day as part of a local charity event (that’s him third from the left in the orange swimmers) – it certainly blew his cobwebs away though and added a bit of spice to things. That’s the thing which I thrive on. Variety. It is supposed to be the spice of life after all.

Socialising and sipping Champagne and Chablis here and there and then quietly reading, eating well (and a bit too much at times) sleeping a lot, chatting and hound-marching with friends mixed with a local theatre production and a dose of Star Wars – a true smorgasbord of a break. I hope your break was full of the things which give you pleasure and fill you up too (metaphorically as well as literally) and that you’ve also launched yourself into 2016 with gusto and intention. I have a little booster for you if you want to add some extra zing to your New Year. (See the article below plus the Year End Review I’ve put together – both of which I use myself).

Thank you for taking the time to read this eZine as I’m sure you have so much vying for your attention. I hope the ideas and suggestions help you reflect and to show up, sparkle and be heard even more at work.

Warmly to you %$firstname$%,


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PS – Oscar Wilde Said it best, %$firstname$% when he said “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Enough said.

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What's Happening

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard ™

3-Day LIVE Event 2016

Shall I keep you posted?

If you know you need to step up and accelerate your success at work AND allow yourself to be seen, valued and heard – do be there in 2016. Here’s the date and it will be in London again. Join me LIVE and learn with and from other ambitious, experienced women like you.

AND it may be the FINAL event like this which I host.

If you’ve been thinking about coming ‘some time’ well, this year in June might be your last chance….

>> 9, 10, 11 June 2016.

Here’s where you can let me know you want to be kept in the loop AND receive extra resources in advance.

Oh and below, here’s a quick video showing a little of what happened in March this year and what you’ve got in store in 2016. Take a few moments to see what comes up for ambitious women like you and what happens when you put yourself into an intentional space like this.

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Tweak 2 letters and change everything

Planning 2016 for how and where you are now

“Mind your Language” is a great piece of advice, truly mind it. Think about it. Think about the effect it has on you and then on those around you as you use it. As a self-confessed WordNerd it’s one of my passions that my clients really “get” how important the words and phrases are they choose and then use. If you already have a sense you could be more influential, more engaging and inspiring to other people, then changing and updating your ‘script’ transforms the way you connect with people.

A few years ago, I read an article by John La Valle http://www.purenlp.com/ and John is, I believe, a true word-nerd. A real wizard with the use of language and the difference it makes. He wrote an article about changing our New Year’s Resolutions and swapping them for New Year’s Evolutions.

Every yearResolutions when someone asks me “so Kay, are you making any New Year’s Resolutions?” I take John’s advice and tell them “yes, but I make New Year’s Evolutions”.

Think about the word Resolution – looking in my trusty dictionary, it means “a firm decision to do or not to do something. The action of solving a problem, dispute or contentious matter.”

When you pull it apart, re-solution becomes a solution, redone. You know when you say it there’s a bit of resistance there. Something you should be doing as opposed to something you want to do. Something you’ve tried to do before and are trying to do again.

It’s so common to make a resolution to eat less, exercise more, spend less, save more, work less, be with family more – or sometimes the opposite! You get the idea, though.

Now, think about the word Evolution – When you think of planning and committing to New Year’s Evolutions, there’s a different feel, a different energy about them with that word. Again, from my trusty dictionary “Evolution – the gradual development of something. Current senses stem from a notion of “opening out” and “unfolding” giving a rise to a New Year Evolutiongeneral sense of development”. Open yourself up to who you are now and what you want, now.

Now with the word Evolution (remember, we only tweaked 2 letters) there’s a more forward motion to it, more of a sense of “Ok, for where I am now and for how I’ve developed now and what I want in my life now, this is what I want for my life in 2016”.

Try putting down 5 New Year’s Evolutions for yourself and before you do, take a moment with these 5 steps to think about how you are “opening out”, “unfolding” and “developing”.

  1. Think about how your life was 2 years ago – at the beginning of 2014 – then think about what’s going on now and how things have evolved for you.

  2. What are the major changes that have happened? (pssst – there will be some major changes, I promise you. It’s one of the few things we can guarantee in life, that things change. We choose how we respond to those changes.)

  3. Next, consider what’s happening in each of these areas of your life – home / work / relationships /career / finances and ask yourself “what do I want to have more of AND less of in these areas now?”

  4. Here’s where your “New Year’s Evolutions” start to form. From where you are now, for the person you are now, for what you’re doing now.

  5. Put down the following words and then finish the sentence at least 5 times “For what I want now, in 2016 I will….”.

So, with two letters tweaked your Resolutions have become your 2016 Evolutions. Oh, and even if you don’t think you’ve changed much, around you the landscape will have, you industry, market, colleagues will have. That changes you anyway. How have you evolved though, that’s the question?

As Oprah Winfrey says: “The whole point of being alive is to evolve into the complete person you were intended to be.”

I’d love to hear what you think. You can leave me a comment or a note here.

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Do you want to use this article in your eZine or on your website?

Please do but only if you include this complete “blurb” with it:
“Article reproduced with permission of Kay White, Savvy & Influential Communication Expert and Mentor at www.kaywhite.com.

Kay shows experienced – and often frustrated – business women (and very smart men) how to be heard and understood by accessorising their day-to-day interactions with subtle, influential phrases and words to make people sit up, listen and take action. Kay’s book, The A to Z of Being Understood is an international #1 Bestseller: http://amzn.to/kTJYdX and helps professionals make their voices heard and their conversations really count.”

To see any previous issues of this eZine or comment on an article, please go to www.kaywhite.com (you’ll find the link to previous eZines on the Blog page, on the right). I’m always interested to hear from you.

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Here are a few soundbites from women who learned my secrets about ASKING for what you want at a Live Event I hosted:

  Asking and expecting to receive is not a self centred position. Have had a number of opportunities to ask for outcomes / changes at work this week and almost without connecting it my position was this is what I need how can you make it happen with me and for me – bingo!”

  The model Kay shared is extremely useful and has many applications, I have some ideas in mind to put it into practice.”

  The model was really good and got me thinking about how I ask for things, both business and personal.”

  Kay articulates and demonstrates clearly understandable and practical techniques to build confidence and to guide you to think further about getting a Yes response. Very often business advice doesn’t work in the ‘real world’. Kay’s does.”

See below for how you can learn the structure and give yourself the confidence to ASK.

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A is for Ask, Assert, Aspire

For 3 more of these sort of positive, punchy and powerful words go to: www.kaywhite.com and find today’s words at the bottom of the page. They’re there to motivate, inspire, compel both you and those around you as you use them every day AND, see below for your Power List.

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YOUR 2015 Year End Review & 2016 Planning Guide

Give yourself the gift of YOUR OWN Year-End Review.

It’s easy to just keep going and dive in to 2016 without taking the lessons, messages and developments from your 2015 with you. It’s all very well taking part in your organisation’s Year End Reviews. What about You? What about what YOU want, now? Personally as well as professionally.

I’ve created 2 special 2016 Career-Accelerating tools for you.

YOUR 2015 Year-End Review & 2016 Planning Guide. Carefully-crafted questions for you to capture your evolution and developments from 2015. Combine these with a way to plan for what you want in 2016. All together in one nifty, yours-to-keep document.

PLUS – on 21st January 2016 (in just under 2 weeks) let me show you how to Ask for what you want. Take the goals you have and put them into action by learning strategic ways to ask. Not wait, hint and hope. “Why Don’t You Just Ask?”

I have a simple and effective structure to share for you to ‘back’ your asks in so it’s easy for people to say YES to you.

All the details are here for you.

As Idina Menzel sings in ‘Let It Go’ from the film Frozen, “It’s time to see what I can do, to test the limits and break through”. It is %$firstname$%.

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Savvy Style & Sparkle Soundbite

Power Posing (You don’t have to wear the Hotpants!)

Give yourself an instant boost in confidence! There’s much written of course about how the mind affects the body. Well, this brilliant TED Talk by Amy Cuddy puts forward the effect the body has on the mind.

There’s a simple stance which helps you power-up when you need to. Especially at work. The Wonder Woman stance. So many women make themselves small or smaller when they’re presenting themselves, instead of doing what works to help you be noticed and stay ‘in the game and on the radar’.

A clue about the stance is a 1970s ‘Female Superhero’. At only 18 minutes, watch and enjoy.

It might just change your stance in 2016 for the better. (And, at my Live Event in June you’ll find out so much more about body language, breathing, voice, style oh, and career acceleration strategies.)

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About Kay

As a Career Moves Mentor, Kay White works with experienced, ambitious career women from all around the world (and some very smart men) and shows them – with a combination of language and strategic moves – how to get noticed, promoted, valued and rewarded at work.

Kay combines private one-on-one, VIP mentoring with group mentoring, live speaking and hosts her own annual 3-day Live Event ’Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE” in London. She also hosts her weekly Podcast Radio Show downloadable from her site or on iTunes.

Using insights from her own +20 year corporate career, Kay shows her clients how to plan out their next moves in their business or career. She also shows women how ‘accessorise’ and enhance their day-to-day interactions along the way making them more comfortable, compelling and engaging. They boost their income, prospects and attract more lucrative opportunities.

Known as the Savvy & Influential Communication Expert, Kay is the Author of the international #1 bestseller ‘The A to Z of Being Understood’. She’s also Founder of Way Forward Solutions Ltd, a multiple 6-figure private coaching & mentoring company. With her straightforward and easy manner, Kay regularly features in magazines and publications. She’s a featured expert in GLAMOUR Magazine in “The Nice Girl’s Guide to Playing Hardball” and a regular guest blogger for We Are The City, a hub network and content site for professional women.

During her 20-year corporate career, Kay worked in the City of London and in Paris to Director level as part of a successful, mainly male, fast-paced team of global insurance brokers. Negotiating multi-million pound, industrial property insurance contracts around the world, she learned (often by her own mistakes along the way) how to – and crucially how not to – get heard, valued and noticed, for the right reasons. Some of her ex-colleagues have become clients and Kay still speaks French – now more enthusiastically than fluently.

Kay and her husband live close to London with their sighthounds, DeeDee & Pharaoh. A lot of Kay’s inspiration comes from walking ‘the hounds’ as she calls them – whatever the UK weather – early in the mornings in the local countryside.

Find out much more at www.kaywhite.com.

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