Positive Linking eZine: May 13, 2016

kay white enewsletter

Volume 133 | 13 May 2016  

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Hello There

Hello there %$firstname$%,

You know sometimes how you just ‘need to get away’? You maybe say it to yourself on the train home but then don’t always do something about it. Well, I know that feeling and so do many of my clients.

One of the private VIP mentoring groups I lead ‘Retreated’ together last week and wow, what an experience. A change of scenery is one thing and a break from the routine is part of it and – there’s what comes up when you focus on yourself and others like you. We came together in a boutique hotel in the countryside and I laid out a buffet of style, strategy, money-making sparkle, community, sharing and true, purposeful introspection. How often do you indulge in and enjoy that for yourself %$firstname$% in corporate life? I know the answer is mainly ‘rarely Kay’.

As well as planning out moves, next steps, angles for promotion and increased visibility and recognition at work, we went to learn about all sorts of things relating to scarves and the tying of them (plus we made our own beaded bracelets). One minute we were focusing on career paths and the next savvy steps they’ll be taking and then, later the same day, we were together trying on clothes and bling and looking, well, fabulous. That’s what I mean about ‘getting away’. Not just from work but from your day-to-day life. Just for a day or so. It’s like being rebooted.

Here we are just before having a private meal together where the conversation flowed way past my planned bedtime – it was magical on so many levels. Nigel, a magician who is part of the Inner Circle of the Magic Circle joined the VIP Golden Circle for an evening. How circular is that?

Thank you for taking the time to read this eZine as I’m sure you have so much vying for your attention. I hope the ideas and suggestions help you reflect and to show up, sparkle and be heard even more at work.

Warm and ever-sparkly wishes %$firstname$%,


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PS – Oscar Wilde Said it best, %$firstname$% when he said “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Enough said.

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What's Happening

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard ™

3-Day LIVE Event 2016

>>>>We’re 60% full already. Are you meant to be with us?

This is a unique opportunity for corporate women, just like you, to work out how to attract more income AND opportunities to lead with your value – without having to sell your soul.

Women from industries such as Banking, Insurance, IT, Asset Management, Hospitality, Accountancy, Law, Compliance are already joining us and – so can you!

There’s never been a better time to be a woman in business stepping up and going for what you want. To attract and leverage opportunities for promotion, recognition, rewards you need to take a stand for yourself and assert yourself – and you must do it in a way, which is true to yourself.

Take some time for yourself and press ‘Pause’ on your day-to-day ‘To Do’ list by joining us, live and in London, to consider, plan and position yourself for more purposeful – and accelerated – career success at work. On your terms.

If you want to:

  • earn more money AND own your own earning power

  • be offered more interesting and challenging opportunities in your organisation or industry

  • AND negotiate for yourself from a position of certainty, join me and let me show you where your own version of ‘sparkle’ can be found, then join me and all the experienced and insightful women you’ll meet at the Event.

>>> Bonus Seat Price: If you use the code: GLITTERBALL at checkout, you can take 50% off the seat price for a limited time.

Here’s where you can find out all the details of what’s on offer for you. Remember the code: GLITTERBALL.

I only wish I could have gone to an Event like this when I was navigating the choppy waters of my own 20+ year corporate career.

Or, in other words – Show Up; Sparkle and Be Heard LIVE.

Here’s a Snapshot of all that’s on offer for you!

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Do you show them what you’re made of?

Remember your brilliance so others can reward you for it.

If you’ve ever heard yourself say any of the following, it gives us a sign you’ve forgotten some of the things that you’re really good at or you’ve forgotten some of the key pieces of your career and life journey.

If you ever think these things and then you don’t speak, you’ll know you’re undervaluing yourself or being undervalued or underselling yourself.

  • “I want to be taken more seriously”

  • “I’m often treated like a secretary rather than a director”

  • “I end up undercutting myself – I give people a price for my services or the salary I want and then I undercut myself and backtrack or apologise”

Are you able to hear one or more things you’ve either said or thought in there? I can promise you I’ve heard these phrases so many times in different formats, in different ways and places. I know just like I’m sure you do, that it’s because that person saying those things doesn’t own or express the value, the importance, the difference that their work makes. So, by definition, other people don’t appreciate it, feel how they value it or understand how valuable it is. It also tells me that they don’t recognise it for themselves. And by definition, they don’t recognise or ‘market’ their worth. Aha.

Now, I never really like to think about marketing myself but, let’s be honest – you do need to be offering yourself and putting yourself forward in the workplace. Showing people what you’re about. So, try this.

If you want to think about it in a marketing sense, think about a four-bedroom house an estate agent is selling and one of the bedrooms is being used as a study. If you’re going to try sell the house, you have to turn that study-style bedroom into a bedroom again because people will look at your house and value it as a three-bedroom house with a study rather than what it is that you’re truly offering which is a four-bedroom house.

They kind of know it on one level, but one of the bedrooms is a study and they’re not seeing it as a four-bedroom house. They have to see it. And an estate agent said to me, “Never underestimate how people need to be shown that fourth bedroom rather than have to imagine it or be told about it.”

It’s the same with you and me.

Never underestimate or assume people get how special and valuable what you do really is. They have to see it or experience it or have it shown to them. Clearly. Don’t assume they can see it for you. They rarely can.

Show them what you’re made of. You owe it to yourself. Why wouldn’t you maximise the opportunities which are so close sometimes you don’t see them? If you help others see your value, they help guide you towards the opportunities too.

My ex-colleague James saw my gifts more clearly than I did and guided me on to the path to where I am now. He asked if I’d heard of coaching back in 2005 when it was virtually unheard of here in the UK. He said I’d always been approachable, smart-thinking, curious (or nosey some would say) and able to connect with people quickly. He guided me to take that first step to what I’m doing now. Pay attention to what people see for you. It’s often pure gold!

I’d love to hear what you think. You can leave me a comment or a note here.

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Do you want to use this article in your eZine or on your website?

Please do but only if you include this complete “blurb” with it:
“Article reproduced with permission of Kay White, Savvy & Influential Communication Expert and Mentor at www.kaywhite.com.

Kay shows experienced – and often frustrated – business women (and very smart men) how to be heard and understood by accessorising their day-to-day interactions with subtle, influential phrases and words to make people sit up, listen and take action. Kay’s book, The A to Z of Being Understood is an international #1 Bestseller: http://amzn.to/kTJYdX and helps professionals make their voices heard and their conversations really count.”

To see any previous issues of this eZine or comment on an article, please go to www.kaywhite.com (you’ll find the link to previous eZines on the Blog page, on the right). I’m always interested to hear from you.

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“It’s really good to take yourself outside of your comfort zone.”

test-alisonAlison attended my 3-Day Live Event and came as a friend of a friend. She didn’t really know what to expect but trusted her friend Sharon!

“Kay has a way of engaging everybody and it making it feel like a very sort of personal exercise so I’m aware that there are many women in the room but it doesn’t feel like you’re one of many. Kay makes it feel really personal.

It feels like you can take a risk and throw caution to the wind and move forward by being open and I think because Kay models openness, it gives us permission to be open as well. One of my biggest Aha moments was when we were doing an exercise on describing what we do. For the first time I was able to really say, out aloud, what I do and it goes so far beyond what I’ve ever said before. Everyone sat up and listened as I said it!

It’s about just taking that step forward and feeling more confident in doing so. It’s really good to take yourself outside of your comfort zone and step into something different because boy, do you learn. Fast.”

— Alison K. Head Teacher, UK Secondary School

Kay's Owl

A is for Alison – and also for Action, Attitude, Awareness

For 3 more of these sort of positive, punchy and powerful words go to: www.kaywhite.com and find today’s words at the bottom of the page. They’re there to motivate, inspire, compel both you and those around you as you use them every day AND, see below for your Power List.

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Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard Podcast

Each week you can pick up tips, steps, strategies and mindsets from my snappy podcast “Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard”.

They’re designed to give you instant ideas, tips and you can listen on the move, on the train or – as a client does – when swimming! They’re downloaded by women from the UK to Australia, from Vietnam to Venezuela, Iran, Iraq and all over China. I always wanted to help women whilst I sleep as well as when I’m awake – well, I definitely do with these timezones!

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Savvy Style & Sparkle Soundbite

Enjoy more audiobooks whilst you’re on the move!

I listen to audiobooks whilst travelling, whilst cooking, whilst being still. Instead of letting the news ‘brainwash’ me day in and out, I carefully limit what goes in, as it were. 

Keep informed of course AND let go of constant news. Drip feed your soul, your spirit and your sense of self with books and podcasts, youtube audios wherever you are. Audible is a brilliant App which keeps you company and your sense of self alive and watered so that you’re always open to learning even when you’re doing something else.

Let me offer you a Sparkly Gift.

If you email caroline@kaywhite.com and put in the title “Audiobook” – for the first 10 people, let me give you a copy of my own Audiobook, The A to Z of Being Understood. Try it on for size. Let me go with you as you go through your day.

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About Kay

Known as the Savvy & Influential Communication Expert for Ambitious Women in Business, Kay mentors and coaches professional women who want to attract promotion, recognition and rewards at work without feeling they have to ‘sell their soul’.

Running her own multiple 6-figure coaching & mentoring business for over 10 years, Kay shows her clients, who are corporate career women at all different stages of their careers, how to naturally attract more income and opportunity while being true to themselves.

Kay’s clients learn how to combine strategic, planned career move-making steps with influencing skills. She also teaches compelling and assertive language and powerful mindsets around, for example, money, ambition and worthiness. She draws on her own 20+ years corporate career in the male-dominated world of London insurance broking. Kay started her career at 18 as a Secretary and left as a Director, having also worked for the company in Paris, to start her own coaching business. Some of her ex-colleagues have become clients and Kay still speaks French – now more enthusiastically than fluently.

Hosting an annual 3-day Live Event for corporate career women “Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE” Kay encourages and shows women how to be the best, most valuable version of themselves so they’re ready to be paid what their worth and go for what they want with certainty. Crucially too, how to have more ease and more fun as you plan your way forward.

Kay is author of the Number 1 Best-Seller “The A to Z of Being Understood” and you can connect and find out more from Kay at: www.kaywhite.com

Living close to London with sighthounds, Jeffrey, Pharaoh & DeeDee, lots of Kay’s inspiration comes from walking ‘the hounds’ as she calls them – whatever the UK weather – early in the mornings in the local countryside. Kay’s husband says she’s the Pack Leader and he’s part of the pack.

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