Positive Linking eZine: May 5, 2017

kay white enewsletter

Volume 151 |  5 May 2017 

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Hello There

Hello there %$firstname$%,

Well, Snowy and I have just returned from the Amalfi Coast in Italy. We went to Positano, a town built into a cliff-face which is famous for the views, the wines and the natural beauty.

We went to Positano on holiday in 2015 and fell in love with the place and it was when we were there we found a company which made personally-designed ceramic tables and decided that ‘one day’ we would return and ‘one day’ we would buy a table like that. A table to have breakfast at and to think of Italian sunshine and special times. I didn’t know exactly when it would be – energetically, financially, logistically there were a number of things to work out – but I knew we would go there and order our table. So, last week we did!

It’s easy isn’t it %$firstname$%, to have those intentions, in the moment, and then when you come home, let them go or let them fall off your list. Or is it? I have had a picture of Positano and the coastline on my Vision Board (here’s my actual picture here) and every day I see it. I still do. The difference is that now we’ve ordered our specially-designed table and, in 3 months, it should arrive. With the lemons, leaves and little bees on it which we wanted included.

As well as realising an intention we’d set, we met up with our friends who live in Milan and had a 3-day break which felt like a week. I’m so excited to see what the table is like with all the special features we’ve included. I’ll keep posted. Setting the intention, pacing ourselves and focussing in on it was why it’s happening now. Pace is important – not everything has to be done today.

Remember %$firstname$%, always be true to yourself – no one else can be the unique, one-off, multi-faceted person you are! No one.

Thank you for taking the time to read this eZine as I’m sure you have so much vying for your attention. I hope the ideas and suggestions help you reflect and to show up, sparkle and be heard even more at work.

Warm and ever-sparkly wishes %$firstname$%,


Let’s connect even more

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PS – Oscar Wilde Said it best, %$firstname$% when he said “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Enough said.

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What's Happening

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard ™

3-Day LIVE Event 2017

Shall I keep you posted?

If you know you need to step up and accelerate your success at work AND allow yourself to be seen, valued and heard – do be there in 2017. Here’s the date and it will be in London again. Join me LIVE and learn with and from other ambitious, experienced women like you.

AND it may be the FINAL event like this which I host.

If you’ve been thinking about coming ‘some time’ well, this year in June might be your last chance….

>> 5, 6, 7 October 2017.

Here’s where you can let me know you want to be kept in the loop AND receive extra resources in advance.

Oh and below, here’s a quick video showing a little of what happened in March this year and what you’ve got in store in 2016. Take a few moments to see what comes up for ambitious women like you and what happens when you put yourself into an intentional space like this.

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Watch Your Pace When Speaking

It affects IF or HOW people listen to you.

Pace, what do I mean by that?

It’s about your rate and your speed of delivery. So many clients of mine race through their content, their ideas, their input and, the truth is, a lot of the time they’ll be tuned out by those who they need to listen to them most.

People lose interests, they can’t process the information quickly enough so lose your thread, they aren’t given enough time or interest to stay tuned in. It makes a big difference to if or how people listen to you if you take the time – choose to take the time – to vary your pace. Your speed. Your way of delivery.

Now when I’m speaking on stage, on group client calls, I’m very conscious of pacing myself, and in pace also comes your speed of response. Your speed of speaking, your speed of action, and deciding on a non-action. Just as well as how and if you decide to speak or respond.

Here are 5 quick and dirty scenarios and tips to help you pace yourself day-to-day both at work and at home:

1. When you’re asked a question, wherever you are, take a moment. Draw breath. Don’t just respond as if you’ve had a tennis ball fired at you. Choose what you’ll say. Buy time with “hmm, that’s a great question, in my opinion …” or “tell me more about what you want to know”. Pacing the other person at the same time. Aha!

2. When you’re telling a story, wherever you are. Pause, speed up with detail and then slow down with the point, the lesson. It adds impact and it gives you a chance to catch up with yourself.

3. When you’re on a conference call. Know the organiser’s name and use it as you jump in. “John, that’s a great point” not just “err can I just say something?”. Even better, “Hi there John, this is Kay White from London, this is how I think we should go” etc.

4. From the stage/a presentation. When you’re introduced, take a moment. 2 or 3 seconds to steady yourself, look at people, give them a sign which says, “I’ll start when I’m ready” and it’s amazing the difference it makes. An experienced musician, a pianist for example, sits, looks at the keys, moves on the seat, takes a breath, then starts. Not leaping on stage and starting straight away. The moment needs build up and the pianist knows the audience needs to settle too.

5. When you’re running a meeting. Rather than feel you have to know everything, ask questions around the table, use people’s names to hook attention and to keep people on track “with 10 minutes left, let’s move on to X” – pacing yourself and your colleagues at the same time.

There are a myriad of other scenarios and tactics you can use. You get the idea though.

Pacing yourself, slowing it down, positioning and settling yourself before you dive in with your thoughts is strategic. It gets and keeps attention and it helps you be more present to what’s actually happening. Now that really is strategic.

I’d love to hear what you think. You can leave me a comment or a note here.

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Do you want to use this article in your eZine or on your website?

Please do but only if you include this complete “blurb” with it:
“Article reproduced with permission of Kay White, Savvy & Influential Communication Expert and Mentor at www.kaywhite.com.

Kay shows experienced – and often frustrated – business women (and very smart men) how to be heard and understood by accessorising their day-to-day interactions with subtle, influential phrases and words to make people sit up, listen and take action. Kay’s book, The A to Z of Being Understood is an international #1 Bestseller: http://amzn.to/kTJYdX and helps professionals make their voices heard and their conversations really count.”

To see any previous issues of this eZine or comment on an article, please go to www.kaywhite.com (you’ll find the link to previous eZines on the Blog page, on the right). I’m always interested to hear from you.

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Snappy Podcast Reviews

Here are just a couple of the Reviews I’ve read straight from ‘the horse’s mouth’ on iTunes… There are 100 podcasts giving your great tips, strategies, ideas and mindset pieces to help you navigate the choppy waters of your career.

Great Advice!

by Rom Com Girl from USA

I especially liked the episode on “saying sorry.” Kay is right on! If you know you say “sorry” a lot, this is a MUST LISTEN!!

Instant Help!

by Surrey, England from UK

Practical, instant help to improve our communication – even just reading over the titles of each podcast is a great reminder of how we can improve the effectiveness of our communication. Keep it up Kay!

by Sonal_S from UK

This is highly recommended to all – Kay gives great advice as always and brings to life bite sized chunks so you can act immediately. I enjoyed particularly learning from Kay’s experience, enthusiasm and passion which inspire you and helps you to Sparkle more and show more confidence in your day to day. Will definitely be tuning in to receive more of Kay’s sprinkling of fairy dust! Thank you Kay!

If you enjoyed the Top Takeaway above, you can listen to a fuller, even more detailed Podcast on this very subject here on iTunes or via my Website here.

Kay's Owl

P is for Pertinent, Punchy, Podcast

For 3 more of these sort of positive, punchy and powerful words go to: www.kaywhite.com and find today’s words at the bottom of the page. They’re there to motivate, inspire, compel both you and those around you as you use them every day.

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Vanessa VallelyImagine being in a huge room with hundreds of other business women and whatever question you needed to ask about the City someone in that room was able to tell you where to go to get the answer. Imagine you then took those answers and put them in a central place where all Women could benefit, well that is exactly what we are trying to achieve with WeAreTheCity.We Are the City

Vanessa Vallely, founder of WeAreThe City shares her intention with creating her hub networking and resources site. It’s packed full with resources and opportunities and I’m always dipping in and out (and I contribute with my Show Up & Sparkle Blog spot).

WeAreTheCity are hosting an Event on 12th May and I’m honoured to be on a panel talking about The Imposter Syndrome. What it is, how it manifests itself AND what to do about it. All the details are here.

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Savvy Style & Sparkle Soundbite

Call (or Pop Over)!

It’s surprisingly effective.

So often we limber up to write an email or text someone a quick message. Instead – I dare you – call.

Go the personal route and see what happens. Often people are so pleased to hear you and not a message of some form it’s a game-changer as far as how connected you and they feel.

Proximity-wise, if it’s possible, drop round. Either personally to see someone or to their desk. Emailing people across the office has its place at times and, be the one who gets up and pops by. It’s a big piece which adds to your visibility and your connection.

You might think it takes longer but – in the long run – it often makes things happen more quickly.

Go on. Call or pop around when you wouldn’t normally and notice what you notice….connection in this life is, I believe, EVERYTHING.

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About Kay

Known as the Savvy & Influential Communication Expert for Ambitious Women in Business, Kay mentors and coaches professional women who want to attract promotion, recognition and rewards at work without feeling they have to ‘sell their soul’.

Running her own multiple 6-figure coaching & mentoring business for over 10 years, Kay shows her clients, who are corporate career women at all different stages of their careers, how to naturally attract more income and opportunity while being true to themselves.

Kay’s clients learn how to present themselves most effectively at work and to combine strategic, planned career move-making steps with influencing skills. She also teaches compelling and assertive language and powerful mindsets around, for example, money, ambition and worthiness. She draws on her own 20+ years corporate career in the male-dominated world of London insurance broking. Kay started her career at 18 as a Secretary and left as a Director, having also worked for the company in Paris, to start her own coaching business. Some of her ex-colleagues have become clients and Kay still speaks French – now more enthusiastically than fluently.

Hosting an annual 3-day Live Event for corporate career women “Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE” Kay encourages and shows women how to be the best, most valuable version of themselves so they’re ready to be paid what their worth and go for what they want with certainty. Crucially too, how to have more ease and more fun as you plan your way forward.

Kay is author of the Number 1 Best-Seller “The A to Z of Being Understood” and you can connect and find out more from Kay at: www.kaywhite.com

Living close to London with sighthounds, Jeffrey, Pharaoh & DeeDee, lots of Kay’s inspiration comes from walking ‘the hounds’ as she calls them – whatever the UK weather – early in the mornings in the local countryside. Kay’s husband says she’s the Pack Leader and he’s part of the pack.

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