Positive Linking eZine: September 12, 2014

Volume 95 |12 September 2014   Register for this Ezine
Hello There


Hello there,

Roller CoasterIsn’t it interesting how situations, emotions and focus seem to be heightened at this time of the year?  We head towards the year-end with the shops starting to stock Christmas/Festive bits and bobs in September and suddenly we’re being guided out of the Summer mode and into Autumn/Winter.  

I’ve been resisting this.  We’ve had lots of outdoor invitations and with weather still fine enough to be in sandals and short sleeves, I’m stretching out the Summer.  I don’t know if it’s the same with you but there seem to be so many people about to have major changes happen or about to cause major changes to happen in their lives.  Clients, friends, family – all the same.  Some really exciting developments and others, really tough.

Ellen and KayWe’re evolving all the time aren’t we, with things shifting in us and around us in equal measures?  What’s interesting though is how heightened it feels at the moment.  A sense of ‘buckle up everyone, it’s going to be bumpy’.  Well, we pay good money to go on roller coasters and you put your belt on and breathe through the twists and turns.  That’s what we’re doing anyway.

We had a spontaneous supper the other Saturday.  They’re the best.  Coming back from a daytime party, we swerved in, on the off-chance, to see my dear school friend Ellen.   Normally out and about and booked up for weeks, Ellen and her husband were just sitting in the garden sipping champagne.  We joined them and then all went out for a meal.  It was such a treat and we all agreed how, as planned and structured as our lives can be, you can’t beat a spontaneous supper with friends.  Again, you go with the flow of it all.

Warmly to you,


Let’s Connect

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PS – Oscar Wilde said it best when he said “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Enough said.

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What's Happening

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard

Show Up, Sparkle & Be Heard ™ LIVE Event –

Yes, it’s already in the diary! 26, 27, 28 March 2015. I’ll be hosting my 3-day Live Event again in London. The room’s booked and, rather appropriately, it’s called The Royal Suite. Well, it is a VIP experience %$firstname$%!

So many women told me they wanted to come when I hosted the event in March this year but had diary clashes, others want to attend again and this time bring their friend, colleague (or boss in some cases). As you know, unless you pick a date, it’s not happening. Well I have – and it is!  I’m also changing a few things around including speakers to add even more depth to the message.  It’s a continual flow and evolution, as with all things. Registration OPENS in October 2014.  Not long now….

Do drop your details here if you want to have all the details first (and news of smaller events I’m planning for the other side of the Summer too!) << news on that soon too

There’s never been a better time to be a woman in business stepping up and going for what you want – without apology. To receive the recognition, rewards and opportunities you know you deserve, you need to take a stand for yourself and assert yourself – and you must do it in a way which is true to yourself. 

As Katy Perry herself says “Baby you’re a firework, c’mon show ’em what you’re worth

Or, in other words – Show Up; Sparkle and Be Heard LIVE.

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Short, snappy soundbites on the GO!

Stay Tuned – iTuned

My weekly podcast:  Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard on iTunes.  Weekly savvy communication sound bites and strategies to help you navigate the waters at work and delivered straight to your computer, tablet, iPod – whatever device you use to access audios.  Here’s where you can Subscribe AND leave a Review.

With downloads from Taiwan, Australia, Malaysia, Sri Lanka, Spain, Romania, India, Germany, New Zealand, France, USA, Canada AND the UK to name just some of the territories, it’s fair to say we’ve “gone global” here at Sparkle Central!  Please take a moment to Subscribe (so much juice in there for you) and to leave a Review. It makes all the difference AND you know how I believe in asking.  

Thank you for your support. If you like what you regularly read here, you’ll hear much more on the Podcast. As Snowy says, “Straight from the horse’s mouth!”

Stars by HelenaC2276 from UK on July 8, 2014 

Brilliant snippets of advice and hints and tips on how to progress in both your professional and personal life all wrapped up in short and easy to listen to podcasts. Anyone who knows Kay or has heard her speak will recognise her clear and practical insight into how to be successful with confidence, ease and a lot of sparkle. I listen to these on my way to work and they set me up for the day. Highly recommended. 

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Going with the Flow – New Website Launched!

It’s taken a real commitment of time, focus and energy both from me – and from my ever-patient team – and it was high time.  Time-blocking late August and early September to pull all the content together for a new website and then, of course, add some much-needed glitter and updated design, it’s now live.

My new and improved website is now http://kaywhite.com and it consolidates all the strands of what I do, offer and the ways I help professional women.  After 3 years of implementing and action it was time to freshen things up.  Evolution is, of course, constant.   It’s been quite a s-t-r-e-t-c-h to decide to change the site to my own name rather than my company name.  It’s all part of the path.  A client said to me “I don’t care about your company name, it’s you I want to find out about Kay”.  Ok then!

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Run Your Own Race at Work

It keeps you nimble and resourceful

Do you find yourself looking around or over your shoulder trying to keep up or make sure no-one else gets ahead of you? We can all waste tons of time and energy concentrating on what everyone else is up to and forget to focus on our own path.  Our own race.

It’s interesting to consider running your own race. I’ve noticed 8 clear success strategies which come into play each time I watch a big sports event and the competitors all refer to these things in one way or another.   I realise they’re success strategies which also come in to play for us every single day in business, as in our lives.

  1. Commit – make a decision to do something, to be someone, to have something and commit to it.  No doubt, no waivering, no ‘faffing’. The stories of athletes moving countries away from their families to get the best training or support.  Making that level of commitment separates you from people who ‘would like to’ rather commit to.   Despite the injuries, the set backs, the personal traumas, they commit and stick to it.  What are you 100% committed to and how does it separate you from the ‘well, I’d quite like to’ players?
  2. Prepare – the training, the lifestyle, the self-care, the mental game. I heard someone say they had run the race in their head so many times so when it came to it and came to winning he felt he already had. He just had to go out there and show us how he’d done it.  In business, to prepare, think through the angles, know your stuff, well it makes you able to be ‘loose’. You’re more flexible when it’s real because you’ve been through it so many times before it was. What are you preparing for and how are you running through it in advance, again and again so you can be ‘loose’ too?
  3. Respect – your competition and get to know them.  Keep an eye and an ear on what other people are doing and respect them for it. There always seemed to be a healthy regard and respect for the competing athletes.  In business, the same attitude helps. In reality no one has the same skills, the same experience, the same story as you. Rather than try to be a clone of someone else, be you and bring your own personality and pizzazz to everything you do and it will always make you special. No one else can do it like you.  What do you know makes you special and different and how could you allow yourself to stand out more for it? 
  4. Support  – take the advice and know-how of people who can see your game as you’re playing it.  Their experience and knowledge then becomes inextricably mixed with your own. Every athlete always cited their coach and mentor in their thanks because they see things you simply couldn’t. I know this to my toes in my business and bring this to my clients in theirs. Who supports you and gives you guidance and input whilst flying your flag with you? 
  5. Usain BoltBelieve – or go home!  I definitely heard that a few times. If you don’t believe in yourself, how can you expect anyone else to?  Standing sure and firm in your belief in yourself isn’t about showing off and being like a peacock, it’s about self-certainty. You know you can’t control what anyone else does, says or how they play the game.   You control how you behave and how you believe and keep believing. The phrase ‘I never, never, never gave up believing’ was a London 2012 quotable. What about you – what are you standing sure and firm in yourself about?
  6. Extra – that extra 10% you don’t think you have.  When you need it, you do have it.  The stories of that extra push, that final “I just went for it” energy that somehow we have when we call it up.  So many Gold medalists and athletes getting their personal bests say “suddenly, I just found more in the tank”.  When you think of something you achieved because you found that extra 10% from somewhere, what difference did it make for you? 
  7. Celebrate – you could virtually see a switch flick.  The concentration, the mental strength, the focus.  Then, the delivery.  Then came the celebrations, the relief and the release.  It’s a true part of the process in whatever you’re setting out to achieve to allow yourself – and anyone else involved – time to celebrate and acknowledge what’s been achieved.  Too often it’s straight on to the next challenge.   What’s something coming up for you which you’ll prepare to do your ‘happy dance’ about?
  8. Run – your own race.  I heard this phrase so often.  Rather than be pushed or mind-gamed by other athletes, the press, the crowd, you stick to your plan because it is your own race.  No one else has the same cards to play with as you and no one else wants the same things as you, they’re not you.  It’s obvious and it’s easy to forget.  Whose race are you running and what’s it really about for you?

SynchroWith all the highs and lows, the twists and turns of our own day-to-day work, rest and play time, I believe Baz Luhrmann, the film director hits it squarely on the nose. It’s as true for you as a career women as it is for an Olympian athlete. 

“Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind.  The race is long, but in the end it’s only with yourself.”

I always remind clients when they come to choice points  “You’re playing with your own hand of cards.  They’re different from everyone else’s.  Play yours.”

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Do you want to use this article in your eZine or on your website?

Please do but only if you include this complete “blurb” with it:

“Article reproduced with permission of Kay White, Savvy & Influential Communication Expert and Mentor at www.wayforwardsolutions.com.

Kay shows experienced – and often frustrated – business women (and very smart men) how to be heard and understood by accessorising their day-to-day interactions with subtle, influential phrases and words to make people sit up, listen and take action. Kay’s book, The A to Z of Being Understood is an international #1 Bestseller: http://amzn.to/kTJYdX and helps professionals make their voices heard and their conversations really count.”

To see any previous issues of this eZine or comment on an article, we’re always interested to hear from you. Please go to www.wayforwardsolutions.com (you’ll find the link to previous eZines on the Blog page, on the right)

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Pis for Peggy Murrah who was struggling with boundaries and keeping her cool at times

“Kay gets right to the heart of the matter.”

We often struggle telling our clients ‘No’ and in a way that they feel heard but at the same time letting them know we are standing our ground. Kay gets right to the heart of the matter in a clear, informative and engaging way.

When I heard Kay say that she teaches people how to be savvy communicators I knew that at a gut level that this is exactly what I need – I told her “Holy crap I need that”.
Kay has a great response for every kind of situation and I’m now am able to be more concise and direct, confident and kind.”


Kay's OwlP is also for Persistent, Pertinent, Playful

For 3 more of these sort of positive, punchy and powerful words go to: www.wayforwardsolutions.com and find today’s words at the bottom of the page. They’re there to motivate, inspire, compel both you and those around you as you use them every day AND, see below for your Power List.

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Plan and Presume Your Moves!


As a professional woman in business it’s definitely time to expect – rather than hope for – that promotion.  At the very least, the opportunity to be in the frame for promotion, which is so often what women leave to chance by hoping or hinting. Phrases like “Why wasn’t I put forward for that?”  My question is always “How did they know you wanted it?” 

One of the ways is to presume using language like “knowing we’re supporting more women in management” or “understanding the spectre of quotas on the horizon, how can I best contribute to ….” And fill in the blanks.  

I’ve lots of things planned to help you plan your moves in a more tactical way on the horizon but, for now, notice what you notice and scatter and sow some seeds %$firstname$%!

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Savvy Style & Sparkle Soundbite

Hand BagHandbag swapper!

As someone who loves her handbags and changes them over regularly, depending on my mood and outfit, this is a sparkly ‘must have’ for you.

A handy bag which you pop all your bits and bobs into and then just lift in and out of any handbag or purse you choose to use that day!  

It also keeps all your things in order so they’re easy to find when delving into your bag – saving you even more time and effort.

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About Kay

About Kay White

Kay White works with experienced business women from all around the world (and some very smart men) and shows them – with a combination of language and strategic moves – how to own, position and speak of their value so their income, opportunities and confidence naturally increases. Kay combines private, VIP mentoring with group mentoring, speaking and hosting her annual 3-day Live Event ’Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE”. She also hosts her weekly podcast radio show ‘Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard’ downloadable from her site or on iTunes.

Using insights from her own 20 year corporate career, Kay shows her clients how to plan out their next moves in their business or career. She also shows women how ‘accessorise’ and enhance their day-to-day interactions along the way making them more comfortable, compelling and engaging. They boost their income, prospects and attract more lucrative opportunities as a result as Kay shows her clients how to add true, personal sparkle. Both to themselves and to what they say.

Working with Kay, her clients discover how to be assertive, attract and keep attention and then ask for and get what they want. It’s a learnable skill to ask for what you want, to persuade, influence and get other people engaged and into action – both in writing and face-to-face. Kay’s developed step-by-step systems for her clients to learn, follow and use the steps every day and everywhere. 

Known as the Savvy & Influential Communication Expert, Kay is the Author of the international #1 bestseller ‘The A to Z of Being Understood’. She’s also a contributing Author in 4 other #1 best-selling books and annually hosts a 3-day Live Event in London for professional women:  Show Up; Sparkle & Be Heard LIVE. With her straightforward and easy manner, Kay regularly features in magazines and publications. She’s a featured expert in GLAMOUR Magazine in “The Nice Girl’s Guide to Playing Hardball” and a regular guest blogger for We Are The City, a hub network and content site for professional women.

During her 20-year corporate career, Kay worked in the City of London and in Paris to Director level as part of a successful, mainly male, fast-paced team of global insurance brokers. Negotiating multi-million pound, industrial property insurance contracts around the world, she learned (often by her own mistakes along the way) how to – and crucially how not to – get heard, valued and noticed, for the right reasons. Some of her ex-colleagues have become clients and Kay still speaks French – now more enthusiastically than fluently!

Kay and her husband live close to London with their 3 rescue sighthounds. A lot of Kay’s inspiration comes from walking ‘the hounds’ as she calls them – whatever the UK weather – early in the mornings in the local countryside.

Find out much more at www.kaywhite.com

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