Preparing for my first Clubhouse Room Event (see the PS if you haven’t heard of or downloaded Clubhouse yet) I realised this was a trait I used to have. Being paralysed by needing to be perfect.
The Clubhouse Room I’m hosting on Monday next, 22nd at 8pm UK, is all about being a Recovering Perfectionist. How debilitating it can be to constantly question yourself or think you’re going to be found wanting.
If you find yourself tweaking and tweaking an email, presentation, application – whatever – if you keep second guessing what’s wanted or what’s good enough then this could be you too?
It certainly used to be me.
I had a fairly strong sense of myself from being very ill when I was 16 years old. Very ill is underplaying it actually. Nearly dying from Ovarian Cancer is more to the point. So even though I was forever grateful to be alive, I still used to allow other people’s opinions of me, perceived expectations, govern my life.
What I wore, what I said, what music I listened to, what I said at work, wanting to please and to be liked MORE than trusting what I thought, said, knew. Sounds familiar? You can never win this one though, that’s what I’ve now learned – fortunately. Not until you let go of being perfect and doing everything…perfectly.
Do you think I could ever write to you, sharing what I know and trusting it hits home for you if I hadn’t learned ‘perfection doesn’t exist’? No way. What about writing a book, hosting events, speaking to big groups? No way. It’s way too “RISKY” if you don’t let go of it having to be perfect. It never is. That’s what I have found to be freeing.
Think about it for a moment…your idea of a ‘perfect’
They’ll all be different from mine! Not better (that’s an opinion) but different. We may be aligned here and there but waiting for us to find that perfection collection – we’ll wait a long time.
Clubhouse is the new social media platform which is taking off BIG time. If you join (you have to download the app), you can find me as @kayjwhite and I’m hosting 2 Club Room events with colleagues of mine from the US NEXT Monday 22nd February at 3pm EST and 8pm UK.
1. Recovering Perfectionists!
10 Ways To Get Out (and Stay Out) Of Your Own Way At Work
2. Conversations with My Younger Self
Lessons Learned I Wish I’d Known Back Then
(Saturday 27th February at 3.3pm UK / 10.30am EST)