“Oh but Kay, you’ll be so lonely..” I’d just told my dear Mum that my partner Steve and I were splitting up. It was the year 2000 and so many things shifted for so many of us.
I knew Steve and I weren’t going to make it into this new Millennium together and, in truth, our relationship had been limping along for while.
My Mum was thinking that I’d be lost without him and being mid 30s as I was, I’d be on the shelf. It would have been easy to have been swayed by this prediction.
Of course Mum had my best interests at heart but she was also looking through the lens of her experience of being happily married at 23 years old. Not mine.
When Steve and I moved out of our shared home my life opened up the very next day. I met Snowy. My husband of 20 years this year. I didn’t know that on the day but I knew I’d met someone fun and different.
AND – the only reason we’re married is because both of us had to firstly experience loss – a failed relationship and heading into the unknown. Secondly, we had to be open to who came into our lives.
Snowy is 5 years younger than me and 7 (he says 6) inches shorter than me! We hit if off as soon as we met in our mutual friend’s kitchen over 21 years ago.
At first Snowy thought I was “some tall posh bird who was good fun” and I thought he was “a short chippy City bloke with a great sense of humour“. Heyho…
My point of sharing this with you is this.
- You never know what’s there right under your nose (literally…) until you pay closer attention and are more open
- Staying in the wrong place too long, knowing it but being too fixed/scared, saps your confidence, energy and opportunities
- Letting others’ fears for you keep you stuck or slow you down. Question “is this true for me?” before you allow it to be your truth…
- You have to let go of one part of the trapeze (the old) and fly through the air a little before the next part of the trapeze (the new or next) appears.
We know all this logically, don’t we , but those close to us can keep us stuck by trying to keep us safe. They’re not us. They don’t know how you feel in that stuckness, only you do.
Sometimes, your only mode of travel is a leap of faith. Many women are taking these right now as they work out what next, what’s important and what’s not. What about you?
Try to listen to your own advice and intuition , not everyone else’s.
(Oh and again, with her best intentions back in the day, my Mum didn’t want me to jump from secretarial work into broking when I did “What if you can’t do it?” I became a Director, worked in Paris, travelled the world and earned high 5-figures doing so.)
>>> Save The Date! Friday 17th September <<<
A One-Day Live Gathering, on line, hosted by me and including many special guests.
ALL focussed on you and IF or how you’re taking care of YOURSELF both at WORK AND AT HOME.. More details soon…
Personal Practices; Potions & Power Moves << all part of our discussions together on Friday 17th September..
Douglas Puppyhound Developments
Now off the lead for spells, Douglas came out with my friend Karen for a long old walk-and-talk catch up!
And his first experience of Doggy Daycare whilst Snowy & I went out for a long lunch! Passed with flying colours, Jeffrey was the naughtiest…